Sunday, December 4, 2011
The 76-year-old woman Walked Down the hallway of Clearview Addiction Clinic, Searching for the right department. She passed signs for the 'Heroin Addiction Department (HAD)', the 'Smoking Addiction Department (SAD)' and the 'Bingo Addiction Department (BAD)'. Then she spotted the department she was looking for: 'Facebook Addiction Department (FAD)'.
It was the busiest department in the clinic, with about three dozen people filling the waiting room, most of them staring blankly into their Blackberries and i-Phones.
A middle-aged man with unkept hair was pacing the room, muttering, "I need to milk my cows. I need to milk my cows."
A twenty-something man was prone on the floor, his face buried in his hands, while a curly-haired woman comforted him, "Don't worry. It'll be all right." "I just don't understand it. I thought my update was LOL-worthy, but none of my friends even clicked the 'like' button."
"How long has it been?"
"Almost five minutes. That's like five months in the real world."
The 76-year-old woman waited until her name was called, then followed the receptionist into the office of Alfred Zulu, Facebook Addiction Counselor.
"Please have a seat, Edna," he said with a warm smile. "And tell me how it all started."
"Well, it's all my grandson's fault. He sent me an invitation to join Facebook. I had never heard of Facebook before, but I thought it was something for me, because I usually have my face in a book." "
"How soon were you hooked?"
"Faster than you can say 'create a profile.' I found myself on Facebook at least eight times each day -- and more times at night. Sometimes I'd wake up in the middle of the night to check it, just in case there was an update from one of my new friends in India . My husband didn't like that. He said that friendship is a precious thing and should never be outsourced.""What do you like most about Facebook?"
"What do you like MOST about Facebook?"
"It makes me feel like I have a life. In the real world, I have only five or six friends, but on Facebook, I have 674.
"Even I'm Friends With Juan Carlos Montoya. "
"Who's he?"
"I don't know, but he's got 4,000 friends, so he must be famous."
"Facebook has helped you make some connections, I see."
"Oh yes. I've even connected with some of the gals from high school -- I still call them 'gals.' I hadn't heard from some of them in ages, so it was exciting to look at their profiles and figure out who's retired, who's still working, and who's had some work done. I love browsing their photos and reading their updates. I know where they've been on vacation, which movies they've watched, and whether they hang their toilet paper over or under. I've also been playing a game with some of them."
"Let me guess. Farmville?"
"No, Mafia Wars. I’m a Hitman. No one messes with Edna." "
"Wouldn't you rather meet some of your friends in person?"
"No, not really. It's so much easier on Facebook. We don't need to gussy ourselves up. We don't need to take baths or wear perfume or use mouthwash. That's the best thing about Facebook -- you can't smell anyone. Everyone is attractive, because everyone has picked a good profile pic. One of the gals is using a profile pic that was taken, I'm pretty certain, during the Eisenhower Administration. "
"What pic are you using?"
"Well, I spent five hours searching for a profile pic, but couldn't find one I really liked. So I decided to visit the local beauty salon."
"To make yourself look prettier?"
"No, to take a pic of one of the young ladies there. That's what I'm using."
"Didn't your friends notice that you look different?"
"Some of them did, but I just told them I've been doing lots of yoga."
"When did you realize that your Facebooking might be a problem?"
"I realized it last Sunday night, when I was on Facebook and saw a message on my wall from my husband: 'I moved out of the house five days ago. Just thought you should know.'"
"What did you do?"
"What else? I unfriended HIM of course!" :)
Labels: Short Stories (Others)
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Hi All,
Its been quite some time since my last post. I have not abandoned this blog, it is just that the post frequency has come down. It is a temporary thing, I would revive it sooner rather than later.
Almost forgot to tell you, this is the 4th anniversary of this blog. Thanks a lot for your support without which this blog would have been impossible.
I promise to bring this blog back on track at least for you people!
Adios,
Deepak
Labels: Deepak's Scribble
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Which way is the bus below traveling?
To the left or to the right?
Can't make up your mind?
Look carefully at the picture again.
Still don't know?
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Primary school children were shown this picture and asked the same question.
90% of them gave this answer:
"The bus is travelling to the right.."
When asked, "Why do you think the bus is travelling to the right?"
They answered:
"Because you can't see the door to get on the bus."
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How do you feel now???
Labels: Puzzles
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Labels: Optical Illusions
Bareilly (Uttar Pradesh), July 20 (ANI): Akshat, a baby boy over the age of one, registered his name in the Guinness world records for having a total of 34 fingers and toes.
He has set the record for having the highest number of fingers and toes and hails from the Bareilly district in Uttar Pradesh.
Amrita Saxena, the mother of the child, said it was difficult for her to believe that her son broke the world record, until a family friend convinced her.
"He (family friend) read on the internet about the baby born in China with 31 fingers. Then he said that my boy has broken the record of having 34 fingers. At first, I was not convinced at all. It was hard to believe that my son has broken the record. But later, he along with my husband and my younger sister registered the data in the Internet. Then I was asked to submit certain documents after which his name was in the Guinness World Records," added Saxena.
Doctors attending to the child informed the mediapersons that it was a rare phenomenon and diagnosed it as polydactyly.
"The person who is diagnosed with it is polydactylic. It is due to certain defects in the bone development of the uterus. The reason behind this defect can be either developmental congenital formation or chromosomal anomalies, which is due to maternal infection or drugs," said Dr. Parul Gupta, a gynaecologist.
Gupta further explained that this congenital physical anomaly could be easily cured by performing a surgery.
"Yes, it is absolutely curable. Mostly people go for plastic surgery. And sometimes when polydactyly is minimal, it can be cured normally, without an operation. And if there is a major problem, then people prefer to go for a plastic surgery," added Gupta.
Meanwhile Saxena was a little worried for her son's future. She aspires for her son to lead a 'normal' life and wants him to undergo proper treatment for it.
It is quite interesting to know that Polydactyly or polydactylism is also known as hyperdactyly. It is a congenital physical anomaly in humans, dogs, and cats having supernumerary fingers or toes.
Labels: News
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
4 criminals are caught and are to be punished. The Judge allows them to be freed if they can solve a puzzle. If they do not, they will be hung. They agreed.
The 4 criminals are lined up on some steps (shown in picture). They are all facing in the same direction. A wall separates the fourth man from the other three.
So to summarize:
Man 1 can see men 2 and 3.
Man 2 can see man 3.
Man 3 can see none of the others.
Man 4 can see none of the others.
The criminals are wearing hats. They are told that there are two white hats and two black hats. The men initially don't know what color hat they are wearing. They are told to shout out the color of the hat that they are wearing as soon as they know for certain what color it is.
They are not allowed to turn round or move.
They are not allowed to talk to each other.
They are not allowed to take their hats off.
Who is the first person to shout out and why?
Answer:
If both Man 2, Man 3 have same hat color. Man 1 shouts opposite color to that of Man 2 and Man 3.
If Man 2, Man 3 have different hat color. Man 1 is quiet. So Man 2, shouts opposite color to that of Man 3!
The 4 criminals are lined up on some steps (shown in picture). They are all facing in the same direction. A wall separates the fourth man from the other three.
So to summarize:
Man 1 can see men 2 and 3.
Man 2 can see man 3.
Man 3 can see none of the others.
Man 4 can see none of the others.
The criminals are wearing hats. They are told that there are two white hats and two black hats. The men initially don't know what color hat they are wearing. They are told to shout out the color of the hat that they are wearing as soon as they know for certain what color it is.
They are not allowed to turn round or move.
They are not allowed to talk to each other.
They are not allowed to take their hats off.
Who is the first person to shout out and why?
Answer:
If both Man 2, Man 3 have same hat color. Man 1 shouts opposite color to that of Man 2 and Man 3.
If Man 2, Man 3 have different hat color. Man 1 is quiet. So Man 2, shouts opposite color to that of Man 3!
Labels: Puzzles
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Labels: Puzzles
Labels: Photography
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